In the complex world of relationships, there’s no “one size fits all” manual to ensure a successful marriage. However, certain books come close by providing practical advice and tools to navigate these waters. One such book is “Saving Your Second Marriage Before It Starts” by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott. [affiliate link]This book is a guide for couples heading into their second marriage and is packed with valuable insights. This blog post aims to review this enlightening piece of work.
Understanding the Book
“Saving Your Second Marriage Before It Starts” is a resourceful guide written by psychologists and marriage therapists Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott. It’s an extension of their first book, “Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts,” and it focuses on those heading into their second marriages.
The book emphasizes the uniqueness of second marriages and the distinct challenges they present. It contains nine crucial questions designed to uncover and resolve potential problems before they become roadblocks to marital happiness. The questions prompt discussions on a range of topics including understanding one’s past, learning to communicate effectively, and balancing the needs of a new marriage with existing family obligations.
The Parrotts’ book is not just theoretical. It provides practical tools for couples. Here are some of the significant insights:
- Unfinished Business: The book highlights the importance of resolving issues from past relationships. It encourages readers to examine their pasts and learn from their experiences to avoid making the same mistakes.
- The Power of Communication: The authors emphasize the crucial role of communication in a successful marriage. They offer practical exercises to enhance understanding and empathy between partners, leading to more effective and meaningful communication.
- The Complexity of Blending Families: Second marriages often involve blending families, and the authors do not shy away from the complexity of this task. They provide concrete advice for navigating these challenges, such as creating new traditions while respecting past ones.
The Book’s Strengths
One of the most commendable aspects of “Saving Your Second Marriage Before It Starts” is its practical approach. The authors understand that second marriages come with their own unique challenges and they address these directly. They provide actionable advice and exercises that couples can apply in their lives.
Moreover, the book’s focus on premarital preparation is another strength. Many relationship guides concentrate on resolving issues after they’ve arisen. However, this book highlights the importance of proactively addressing potential issues, which can prevent many problems from occurring in the first place.
While the book offers a wealth of advice, some readers might feel overwhelmed by the level of introspection required. Working through past issues can be challenging and might require additional support from a therapist.
Furthermore, while the authors offer advice on blending families, more complex situations involving multiple families or children might need more specialized guidance than what the book provides.
In conclusion, “Saving Your Second Marriage Before It Starts” is a valuable resource for anyone heading into a second marriage. It’s a practical, insightful guide that can help couples build a strong foundation for their future together. While it requires commitment and a willingness to confront potentially uncomfortable issues, the payoff can be a healthier, happier second marriage.
Remember, books like these should not replace professional help if needed. They should be seen as tools that can provide guidance and spur thoughtful conversation between partners. Ultimately, the success of a marriage relies on the mutual effort, understanding, and commitment of both partners.